Saturday, June 23, 2007

regrets...i've had a few

this is something that happened way back in those high school days. it has been on my mind ever since. not constantly, but more and more as my kids get older.

sara and i hung out with some boys who were about a year younger than us. not an attraction thing, but they were fun and one boy had a mom who would let us spend the night, and even call our parents for us. she was "cool" like that. she wasn't a pretty woman, not by any stretch of the imagination (think of the crooks' mom on the goonies movie). one day sara and i showed up at her trailer. (she had like 5 or 6 kids and lived in a 2 bedroom trailer) sara walks to the bedroom and knocks, goes in for a minute, then says to me "it's ok, come on back". me, i'm not thinking anything funny or weird, i walk back there and she is laying on her bed with one of her son's friends. (let me say this, he was about 16 at the time) i am so naive, i didn't think anything about it. it's a little strange, considering her son isn't even home, but they weren't below the covers and their clothes were on. we talk about whatever, i don't even remember what, and then we leave. after we left, i found out that this woman and the son's friend were "together". and not only that, but her baby, her 6 mos old baby, is HIS. now do the math my friends. 16 year old kid-6 mos old baby-9 mos for pregnancy= really disgusting and illegal. and the guy wasn't bad looking. not great looking, but not "hooking up with 40 year old goonies mom" ugly! anyway, you may be saying to yourself, what (besides the obvious nasty ol' lady and teen boy) is bothering me. well i will tell you. it is the fact i did nothing to stop this. NOT A FRIGGIN' THING! i should have told someone, called dfs, something. this was not only immoral and gross, but illegal and i didn't do a single thing to stop it. this guy was like 14/15 when this all started, and was stuck with this woman because of his son, that he couldn't even claim as his son because she was afraid they would take away her other kids. i felt really sorry for her son, he was a really nice guy, in show choir, and football. nice kid. i felt sorry for her other kids, i mean really, what kind of example is this?

anyway, i have felt soooo guilty about this. i know i was only like 16 or 17 when all this happened, but i was old enough to know this was wrong. i guess it scares me more and more because my kids are getting older and i am scared about the kind of people they will meet. i don't want them to be exposed to people like this, or even worse, get mixed up with them. i guess i hope they will be more convicted in their beliefs in what is right and what is wrong. i don't want them to witness something like that, but if they do, i pray they know the right thing to do and do it.


Rachel Huse said...

Wow, Amy! That is something heavy for a 16 year old to see and carry with her! Don't blame yourself, at that age, you probably didn't think that if you HAD told someone anything would have come of it. I know when I was 16, I didn't think anybody listened to anything I said anyway.

Well, worst-case scenerio, if your children witness anything (not just that type of situation) if they feel comfortable to come to you, you've done a great job!

You're a terrific mom, Amy!

Mana said...

You write very well.